Yunel "The Cuban Missile" Escobar

Nicknames should flow easily. They should have some personal significance and tie to the individual. They should be fun. If possible, they should even embody some aspect of the the person they describe. Lebron "King" James, "Joltin" Joe Frazier, Ron "Rhinoceros" Jeremy, you get the picture. With these rules in mind, I propose "The Cuban Missile" as Yunel Escobar's.
Let's start with the obvious: he's from Cuba. His game is explosive, from his rocket (see where we're going?) arm and ability to cover the left side of the infield, to his line-drive, free-swinging approach at the plate.
It's more than his game, though. This nickname also references Escobar's personality and emotion: the Cuban Missile Crisis featured everyone's favorite dictator, Fidel Castro, a man who, with help from the Soviet Union and the US, nearly started World War III. Passionate and unpredictable, he was the center of this Cold War event. What does he have to do with Escobar? I present an illustrative example. Let's say Yunel gets hit by a seemingly innocent pitch. What does he do? Walk it off on his way to first? No! He glares towards the mound, menacingly pointing his bat and screaming at the pitcher.

Dictator or SS?

Remind anyone of another fiery, maybe not-quite-all-there Cuban?
What's that? Not good enough? OK, what does Escobar do after hitting a tailor-made double play ball to the shortstop? Trudge down to first with his head down in dissappointment? No! He flips the bat into the stands!

Watch Out in the Booth!

This nickname is perfect. I'll make it stick if it's the last thing I do. And don't even tell me that Alexei Ramirez has already claimed it. When his average gets above Jordan Schafer's and his OBP above Francoeur's, then we can talk.